Jingle the Twin Bells

to the melody of Jingle Bells
by Allison on Erin, taken from LotRSpoofs.com so it won't get lost

~~

Jingle Bells, Gollum smells
Frodo took the ring
Eowyn's in Edoras
And Aragorn is King, Hey!

Revised Verse 1

Oh, Jingle Bells, Gandalf fell
With Balrog right upfront
Orcs swarm all ovverrrr
While Aragorn is on a hunt, Hey!

Verse 2

Jingle Bells, Smeagol smells
Gondor's ruled by a nut
Which Saruman tried to destroy, but Gandalf kicked
His butt!

Revised Verse 2

Jingle Bells, Smeagol smells
Shadowfax is white
And he helps Gandalf too
Thru great big times of plight

Verse 3

Dodging thru Mount Doom
Killing ugly orcs
Gandalf is alive
And Saruman lost his cork, hahaha

Revised Verse 3

Riding thru Rohan
Eomer gives bad news
While Chopping off orcs' heads
There may have been hobbits too

Verse 4

Gondor's going to fall
Now nazgul can fly
Sauron's evil is spreading
And Arwen's going to die

Revised Verse 4

Pippin sings a tune
While the steward gnaws
Nazgul are attacking
Soon Gondor's going to fall!

Verse 5

Middle Earth is doomed
And the dwarves don't care
Frodo go entombed
While in Shelob's lair

Revised Verse 5

Middle Earth is doomed
And the dwarves don't care
Legolas is mad
Cause he messed up his hair

Verse 6

Oh, Jingle Bells, Towers fell
Arwen is a wife
All the elves sailed to the west
And Frodo gets a life, Hey!

Verse 7

Oh, Jingle Bells, Aragorn smells
Cause he needs to bathe
Legolas is shooting Wargs
And dancing all the way, Hey!

Revised Verse 7

Oh, Jingle Bells, Samwise spells
Cause Gollum does not know
Frodo gets kidnapped
He can't tell friend from foooeee!