The Bagginses

A swallow carrying a coconut?

Explanation: Those of you who know Monty Python's Holy Grail don't need one. Hm. Those who don't know Holy Grail need one - but I can't really give one... . Except that perhaps we're just honouring Peter Jackson's humour who mentioned that a lot of his humour was derived from Monty Python, which he watched as a child and adored. Long Live Python! Nee!

Where d'you get the coconuts?

I found them.

Found them? In the Shire? The coconut's tropical!

What do you mean?

Well, this is a temperate zone.

The swallow may fly south with the sun or the house martin or the plover may seek warmer climes in winter, yet these are not strangers to our land?

Merry!?! Is he suggesting coconuts migrate?

Not at all. They could be carried.

What? A swallow carrying a coconut?

It could grip it by the husk!

It's not a question of where he grips it! It's a simple question of weight ratios! A five ounce bird could not carry a one pound coconut.

Well, it doesn't matter. Will you go and tell your master that Aragorn from Rivendell is here?
*we pretend this discussion is pre-coronation*

Listen. In order to maintain air-speed velocity, a swallow needs to beat its wings forty-three times every second, right?

I'm not interested!!!

It could be carried by a Gondorian swallow!

Oh, yeah, a Gondorian swallow maybe, but not a swallow from the Shire. That's my point.

Aragorn - Legolas, what are we looking for?

Legolas, before you leave Rivendell, do not forget your hairdryer!

PJ: Take 99. Come on, Orlando, get it right! You only have to let go of that arrow!

Legolas, just after he realized that he was the only one fighting this entire orc army.

Of all places for Sting's orc-detectin' batteries to go out again, Mr. Frodo. Life-time guarantee my furry foot! Piece o'junk! *tosses Sting into pit nearby*

Frodo thought it was strange that he should go through such a metamorphosis and turn into a spider...

Frodo's reaction to his first viewing of "Fear Factor".